Aren't you just being overprotective? All homeschoolers hear that statement at some point, correct? You are just being too protective or overly sheltering, or hiding from reality, etc. Those statements really need to be qualified and defined because in reality they are often false claims.
A few weeks ago, I was sitting with my just turned 6 year old waiting for her older sister and I was talking with a mom. This very normal mother told me that at various times they had considered homeschooling but always decided against it because they didn't want to overly protect their children. I didn't feel like replying to that statement, so the topic of conversation changed to biking. This mother was bemoaning the fact that her 8 year old had only just learned to ride a bike and that it was such a painful ordeal. So they researched some new type of bike stand thing that teaches kids balance in order to prevent the next child from being so traumatized by falling. Keara was sitting next to me listening to this conversation and she had to pipe in, "Well, when I turned 5, Tegan just went and took off my training wheels and then she took me to the top of the hill and said, 'Don't fall down or you will die.' So I pedaled and didn't fall down and die. Then we went and told mom, and I haven't had any problems since." You can guess how that statement was handled by the crowd.
A few weeks later, we were at the park. Josh and Matt went fishing and I had all the girls at the playground. The girls know the rules, don't leave the area, no fighting, and if a another mom doesn't like what they are doing come and sit by me for a bit. They all ran off to play. My 6 year old was relishing that she could do the monkey bars all by herself. She fell off but got up and kept going. They all ignored the rules of the playground, which is fine with me because playground rules are stupid and I don't encourage my kids to follow mindless, stupid rules. They climbed up slides, but not when anyone was coming down, and over the outside of equipment that wasn't meant to be climbed and No one got hurt. Meanwhile, I watched several helicopter moms shadow their kids from one end of the playground to the other. I also noticed that their children were incapable of doing things that they should have been able to do for their age. Watching the entire playground more intently, I noticed that many of the bigger kids could not swing on their own nor could any other child go across the monkey bars or use the zipline without falling off. The only kids trying those things had mommy shadowing below. At one point, a dad who was clearly military became frustrated with his sons inability to do basic playground tasks and began teaching them and therefore allowed them to fall down in order to learn. His wife was livid and the learning session didn't last for long. Eventually, someone came over to chastize me for allowing my children to improperly use the playground equipment. Apparently we were setting a bad example since my kids were capable of standing on the swings. During that afternoon, my 6 year old had to defend our family to 2 girls who accused us of being wierd since we had 7 children, dressed in skirts and homeschooled. My 7 year old had to explain to some child that, "No, mom is not exhausted all the time just because there are 7 of us." I guess we know what that little girl was hearing in her home. And my oldest had to defend modesty. But the last thing I heard as we left, was another mother commenting on how "sheltered" those children must be.
While travelling through the South, we heard this same comment a few times in more subtler ways from family and friends, and former neighbors. Apparently, since I do not force my kids to read The Hunger Games or Twilight or allow them to have modern music, or wear normal clothing or watch whatever they want on TV, I am being a terrible over protective mother and my children will end up being horribly dysfunctional or something. But the irony is that the individuals who make these comments are advocating for immature kids. My oldest can cook a meal from scratch and bake anything and can without supervision. She can do the laundry and is learning to iron. My 11 year old son has cut down trees, with an AXE and climbed onto our roof to clean out the gutters. He has helped dad to rewire the house, and fix plumbing and take apart an old car. My 7 year old can clean a bathroom with bleach. My 3 year old can use a Magic Eraser to clean Her own drawings off the wall. I expect my children to dress themselves with zero help by 18 months. So I must ask who is being overly protective?
So making your children infantile by protecting them from falling off a bike and falling off a slide is not sheltering? Having older children who can not cook, clean, or plant a garden without complete supervision but who dress like tramps and listen to lousy music and talk about pointless books and music, JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER KID, is apparently living in the "REAL" world; however, training children who are capable of engaging and defending their family values at the age of 5 and can function in real world skills at a very young age is "hiding from the real world". Please give me a break. My children aren't perfect and some of them will fall but I will continue to "shelter" them and allow them to grow up as competent Individuals who are capable of falling down and getting themselves back up, in opposition to those incompetent, infantile "real world" kids who need their helicopter mommas to rescue them. So the next time you are challenged with the fallacious assumption that you are being "over protective" ask the challenger to define that term. And watch the ignorant assumption fall apart.
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